Divorce is a lonely journey. It allows for only one person on the road, with only enough room for an experienced divorce lawyer. It is tough going, even if you know it is for the best. Getting support is, therefore, vital when you are going through a divorce.
What can you do when you need support from your family and friends? Here are some tips.
Acknowledge your need for support
It is not weak to need support. You are just as human as the next person. Acknowledging the need for support helps you to balance the desire to be “strong” all the time and gives you the platform to accept support when it comes.
Ask for support
Do not be afraid to ask for support. Take the first step to tell people that you need their help. Be specific about what you need so that your family and friends know what to do. Often, family and friends are not sure of your needs and may hesitate to offer support for fear of hurting you further. By telling them what you need, they will be able to give you the necessary support.
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Reopen your wounds
Some of us suppress and ignore our pain because we think that we cannot handle it. While it is too painful to do so in the beginning as it is overwhelming, reopening your wounds as you move along the journey helps you to manage your pain. Let yourself feel the hurt instead of suppressing it gives you the courage to continue the journey. You will come to realise that the pain comes in smaller sizes as you reopen the wounds again and again. Once you find yourself managing the pain better, you will become more confident about the path ahead and the things that you must do.
Be careful with advice from your family and friends
While your family and friends will always have your interests at heart, they may become overprotective and gives you advice that you are not ready to follow. Your sister may tell you to “never speak to the cheating bastard again”, but if you have children, you will need to maintain a working relationship. There are many other issues that you need to take care of, so do be careful with the good intentions from your family and friends. They may not always be the best advice to follow.
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Find a confidante or a therapist
If you have a friend who is able to journey with you through the emotional turmoil, schedule a time with him or her every day to talk about how you feel. If there isn’t one, seek out a therapist who can journey with you. It is crucial to have someone who can hear your pain without taking over or pushing away from you. This person is also the one who will give you a nudge when you are stuck or alert you when you become unbalanced in your mental and emotional thoughts.
Find an experienced divorce lawyer
It is essential to engage an experienced family lawyer to get the necessary professional support while going through a divorce. A knowledgeable lawyer can advise you on the various pit holes in the process and also help you to get the best outcome in your situation.
As you can see, there are many ways to get support while going through a divorce. Don’t feel that you are all alone in this world. Many will give you support when you ask!
