When you’re a newly single mother, you may feel both relief and apprehension about your new life. Many divorced moms in Singapore worry about living on a single income, feel the pressure of being the primary-care parent, and wonder if they’ll ever have a happy, fulfilling life independent of their children again.
It’s not going to happen overnight, but you can create a happy, healthy life for yourself and children after divorce. Here are five tips to help you get started.
- Be patient with yourself. Although you may want to make life feel “normal” as soon as the divorce is finalized, it’s going to take time to figure out your new normal. Don’t try to rush through the process. Allow yourself to grieve your old life and discover how you and your children can thrive in this new situation.
- Ask for help. As you adjust to your newly single status, don’t be shy about reaching out to your support system for assistance. Family and friends often want to help but aren’t sure exactly what you need. If you need a night of babysitting, help with assembling furniture or making household repairs, or just need someone to talk to, go ahead and ask. If you don’t have a support system, look online: there are several online groups for single or divorced moms in Singapore.
- Set a budget. You’ve probably already set a budget during the divorce process, but if you haven’t, you should as soon as possible. Having a budget will help you to have a realistic view of your expenses, needs, and where there might be an economic shortfall. If you’re still in the process of divorce, talk to your Singapore divorce lawyer about subsidies that may be available to you as a single parent.
- Take care of yourself. When you’re a single mom, it’s common to be so focused on the kids that you forget to take care of your own well-being. But think of it this way: if you don’t take care of yourself, the household will come to a standstill if you become sick or burnt-out. If your children spend time with your ex-spouse, take advantage of those days or hours by doing something that brings you pleasure. If your ex is not around, then hand off the kids to family or friends (or a babysitter if it’s in your budget) to get some peace of mind.
- Seek counseling. If you’re struggling with life after divorce, there’s absolutely nothing wrong in seeking professional help. A therapist specializing in divorce or family issues can help you deal with the emotional fallout from divorce and get your life back on track.